A Philosophy on Life (and sandwiches)

This is actually my third attempt at keeping a blog (although the second attempt was only created because I wanted to leave a comment with someone else. And the first attempt was started in Spain, and how can you be expected to slave away behind a hot computer screen when there's so much free tapas to be had?). As usual, the decision came with impeccble timing, as it also came on the eve of my starting a new job, marking the end of my nocturnal lifestyle.

It all started with philosohy. I was sat in Mack, enjoying a post-service lunch. It was the day after Chris and Angela's wedding, possibly the most joyful event I've been to (including my own wedding, but then I think your own wedding is designed to be something that you worry through, and then look back on fondly.) And the day after was just as joyous - there was food, drink, friends and visitors, and everything was basking in a kind of contented glow. I was enjoying some light intellectual dinner conversation at a table of people which included the Williamson brothers and Peter. We talked of art, and muic, and the first CDs we ever bought. I was just engaging Andrew on the subject of the best way to eat cheese, when Dave intervened by sticking something down his back.

Our conversation may have been short-lived, but it reminded me of a philosophy that I once developed, probably on one of my early morning commutes. I was disappointed not to share such an enlightening piece with my friends, especially as it could possibly have changed their lives. This thought so saddened me that I threw aside my earlier apathy and reluctance to start a blog, and devoted myself to hours of meditative reflection and internet research. What does it matter that I forego the washing up, that I abandon the sweeping of floors, if in doing so I contribute to the betterment of mankind? And what better way to share that news than by creating a blog and making all my friends read it? So here it is, dear reader.

A "Crusts First" Philosophy of Life.
Deceptively simple. When faced with any plate of food, you have a choice - you can either go for the food you like most, or the food you like least.(1) Now, it may seem like a simple choice - who wants to fill up on the less desirable food? Yet there is another way.
My approach springs from that most common of foods: the sandwich. Now if you follow wholesome youngs boys in bread adverts, then the best way to eat a sandwich is to grab it in both hands and take a sizeable bite out of the middle. This is fine for the first bite, but then you're still hungry, and all you're left with is a semicircle of crust with a few soft bits of bread. You suffer through the rest of the sandwich, for the sake of a cheap thrill in the preliminary bite. Now if you were to eat the crusts first, you fill up on the less desirable bits which are, however, mitigated by the satisfaction of having curbed your hunger. You can then settle back, and finish by eating the choicest morsel of food. Because the most desired parts of a meal are usually the smallest, it is easy to avoid the one risk you run with this philosophy - that of being full up before you reach your favourite part.
You can apply it to eating pizza, Sunday lunch, or any other meal. It even applies to those whose preferences vary - simply reverse it if you are yourself quite partial to crusts. It can even stretch to non-culinary activities. Ca fait tout.

(1) There is a Third Way, but it's not talked about.